Spero
by Tomocopter
Summary: What are you expected to do with what they leave behind?


She didn't know what to do with his hat.

Part of her thought she should just throw it away. She had no way of getting it back to him, and she was never one for sentiment. What point was there to holding onto a memento from an almost-potential love interest who she would never see again? Getting rid of it was probably the only way she could move on from all of this anytime soon. She should get rid of it.

She eventually managed to make her way home, rushing home through the rain in an attempt to avoid seeing anyone she recognised from the arc incident. All of this was hard enough as it was. Part of her wanted to find Tillie, and talk with her about what had happened since she had left the diner, but even if she did, what could she say to her? _Yeah, so I managed to just about miss the man who may have been the love of my life, and chances are I'll never see him again. I managed to save a memento though, where do you think I should put it?_ Not a conversation she was prepared to have right now.

She fell into her chair once she reached the house, and took another chance to examine his hat. She really should get rid of it. If she kept it around, it would only give herself another excuse to kid herself that he might actually come back. Small chance of that happening now. She closed her eyes, and tried to suppress any thoughts she might have of a future where she finally achieved her dreams, and especially any kind of future with him in it. It was nearly embarrassing how miserably she was failing on all counts.

_If you're gonna be pathetic Sawyer, you may as well just go for it._ She sighed to herself as she took out his list, accepting her total lack of willpower. Go to Hollywood - Check. Get an agent - Check. Get discovered. She smiled at that one. After the days event there was no doubt in her mind that his was a name that none of the big-wigs in Hollywood would forget anytime soon. She'd have to mark that one off for him later. It'd be nice to see his list at least half full.

What would he do once he got home? There was little worse in the world than explaining to the people you loved where it all went wrong, she knew that better than most. She was more impressed that he had the guts to face it. Even when she had totally given up on her dream she had never been able to go back to face her friends and family knowing that she was a failure, not really. Everyone always saw her as such a strong person, but that was one area where she was painfully weak. All she could handle was an annual trip back to her father, where he became increasingly worried as he was forced to watch his only child became a shell of her former self. Maybe it's kinder to stay.

She was broken out of her thoughts by the sound of her phone ringing. Tillie, she thought. She nearly let it ring out, but she knew that wasn't fair. Hell, she was the only one who really understood how she felt about all of this, and Sawyer was in no position to turn away sympathizers And if she left it any longer Tillie would just think that she had stopped him, which was much worse. She reached for her phone. _Hi, Tillie. No, I didn't make it. It's okay, I'm okay. No, you don't have to come over. Really, I'll be okay. I just need some time alone, I'll get some sleep. I'll call you in the morning. Yeah, I'm sorry too_.

She hung up, deciding that sleep wouldn't do her any harm after that day she had. Before that, she did have something to attend to. The hat. She picked it up, running a hand over the straw. Maybe I don't have to get rid of it tonight. I can deal with of all this tomorrow.

* * *

She wandered out her bathroom bleary-eyed as she heard the mail arrive. In spite of her good intentions, sleep hadn't come to her as easily as she would have hoped. The sleep itself hadn't even been that restful, thanks to the presence of Danny. She still couldn't decide whether that was a good thing or not. Picking up her mail, and felt her heart skip a beat as she saw the L.B Mammoth logo staring back at her. She ripped at the envelope with shaking fingers, dreading to think of what what might be in store for them after all they had happened the day before.

She had to reread the letter in her hand more than once before she could make sense of it. Invited to what now? Considering she was expecting to be sued just minutes before, this was an almost pleasant surprise. How could this have even happened? Looking down at her letter, suddenly it hit her. He couldn't have.

She smiled to herself at that. It was one hell of a long shot, but she was willing to take the risk. She just needed one more thing. Nearly running to her living room, she took Danny's schedule out from his hat. _You never know._


End file.
